The other day I was looking for a note I had made in a notebook about the novel I’m currently writing. Should be easy enough, I thought.
How wrong I was!
Simply opening my desk drawer was quite a task, it was so rammed full of notebooks and diaries, and pens and random pads of sticky notes…and then when I finally got it open I had to sift through it all to try and find the particular notebook I was looking for, right at the bottom. Eventually I found it (a pink, sparkly leopard print number from Paperchase!), but my epic journey through that drawer of notebooks and pens made me realise something: I have a serious stationery buying problem!
I always knew I had a slight hoarding habit, and I knew my book collection was pretty insane, but I hadn’t realised the ridiculous levels to which my stationery habit had risen! Apparently, a whole other addiction had crept up on me, so I thought I’d do a quick post here on the signs to look out for if you think you’re a fellow stationery addict. Hopefully, then you can catch it early, and get down to the local stationery-addicts support group (because I’m sure that must be a thing!)!
So here are 5 signs that you may be a stationery addict:
- You have more than 5 notebooks you haven’t written in yet.
How many notebooks does anyone – even a writer – actually need? Maybe three or four for different purposes (planning different projects for example, or for different types of writing?)? Then each of these different notebooks could be replaced with a new one once it’s full.
Well, that’s probably what a normal, well-adjusted person does, but stationery addicts…not so much! We literally stockpile notebooks that we’ve bought ‘because they were pretty’, and assign purposes after the event. Or not. Generally, they just sit amongst the hoard, awaiting their destiny in a drawer, long after purchase. And there really is nothing sadder than a neglected, unwritten-in notebook!
- An ordinary reporter’s notebook won’t cut it: you need glittery covers, dividers and all that jazz!
In the age of computers, there’s a certain bizarre romanticism to writing by hand, and so as a stationery addict it can feel almost sacrilegious to write in a plain old notebook. It almost feels as if I owe it to my terrible scrawl to only put it in a notebook that is special, or at least has some sort of enhanced features!
- You’ve uttered the words, ‘wow, this pen is a great writer!’
From my experience, normal people don’t tend to comment all that much on the performance of their pen unless it’s running out of ink and they are having some kind of pen-related rage.
Us stationery addicts, on the other hand, are connoisseurs, and like a fine wine, a fine pen is the greatest delight. No scratchy, patchy biros for us…only the smooth gliding of an exceptional roller ball or gleaming fountain pen will do!
- Your answer to ‘does anyone have a pen I can borrow?’ is generally ‘Yeah, but what sort? Black, blue, pink, green? Bic or Staedtler? Ballpoint or biro? Or is this more of a fountain pen or medieval quill situation?’
Most people don’t think much about the vast variety of pens there are out there. If the one nearest to hand works, then all is well in the world.
Stationery addicts, on the other hand, know all the best brands, the best types and have a huge array to offer to the potential pen-borrower…but God forbid that you should fail to return the pen they have so carefully picked out for you!
- You get ridiculously excited about innovative stationery.
Erasable pens? Colour changing pencils? To-Do notepads attached to magnetic clipboards that you can stick on your fridge? Planners with sections allocated to things you didn’t even know you should be planning? That’s more exciting than the new iPhone or latest game console to a stationery addict.
Imagine that: a pen that you can erase! It’s just like a pencil, but it’s a pen!
So does this sound like you? Are you a fellow stationery addict? Are there any signs of stationery addiction that I’ve missed?