- You simultaneously think you’re an undiscovered literary genius and the worst writer to ever hold a pen.
You’re in the midst of a great writing session and your fingers are flying across the keyboard, and you’re thinking to yourself ‘this is pure gold!’ Then you read it back, and your self-esteem and entire self worth as a writer plummets past your feet. Awesome.
- People keep asking you what your book is about.
Do you want the long version or the short version? The short version? Oh, sorry, there isn’t one.
- Your best ideas occur to you in places where you can’t note them down…then you forget them.
You get an absolutely fantastic idea for your next story, but it just so happens that you’re driving/in the shower/at work/fending off sharks (no idea why you would be doing that, but oh well!). ‘No matter’ you think. I’ll write it down when I pull up/get out of the shower/leave work/when (if) I survive the shark attack…wait what was the idea again?
- The totally different experience that is reading a book as a writer.
If you’re not reading along, picking holes in the plot or characters and thinking to yourself ‘that’s not how I would have written it’, then you’ve gone into a downward spiral of envy and despair. How can you ever hope to write anything that good? You should just quit writing now!
- You have imaginary friends.
It’s the only way you can really describe becoming emotionally attached to people you’ve made up in your own head!
- Reality is always getting in the way of your daydreaming.
You’re just sitting around, fighting dragons and investigating crime (you know…in your head), but people just keep interrupting. Don’t they know this is serious? Just because your boss wants you to stop staring into space and do some work, and your family members want to actually interact with you!
- You’re a master of procrastination.
So you’ve a mammoth writing session planned for when you’ve finished doing your laundry…although you’d better check Twitter first…oh, and Instagram. And you’ll need a nice cup of tea for when you do your writing. And maybe a biscuit. Two biscuits? OK, it’s time to sit down now and get some writing done!
But wait…it’s nearly five o’clock now, and you’re meant to be meeting your friend in half an hour. Oh well, too bad!
- Your next idea is always better than the one you’re working on now.
The idea you’re working on now seemed great, you know, before you started working on it. But now there’s this shimmering new idea, dancing before your eyes, and it’s just so tempting…you start work on that one and it’s just as amazing as you thought it would be! But wait…what’s that distant shimmering in the corner of your eye? Maybe it’s an even better idea!
- The emotional turmoil of killing off a character.
Rest in peace, figment of your imagination. It was nice knowing you.
So can you relate to any of these #writerproblems, or is this just me? Any others I’ve forgotten about?